OK after a couple more hours trying to track down what is happening I am getting a reliable wifi connection =-D
I haven't tracked down exactly what is happening but I can report what I did to eventually yield some joy. In the past I have found that if you keep plugging away rather than give up you will get it working.
Windows 10 Firewall: IME this is where settings need a look over and toggle and they don't really take effect until after at least one reboot. The windows 10 Defender firewall pop-up dialog warning you typically get after installing new software that we typically always choose "allow connection" to doesn't tell the whole story. Whether Win10 automatically identifies a missing dll or driver and then downloads in the background, I am unsure of...but that is what it seems like it is doing to me. Ask to do something new with a new program and Win10 suddenly seems to do an update and you are suddenly in business. Black Magic mumbo jumbo that doesn't inform the user....ugh...that's what I think it is...but I don't know for certain.
OK, what I actually did (sorry, it is a lot) btw Win10 Pro 1709 build 16299.846 (auto updates set to "off" as much I can):
1) install rtpMIDI and follow tutorial
2) in rtpMIDI: manually create a peer "device" using the "+" radio button under the "Directory" input field>
pop-up dialog "Add Remote Peer" requires a name and host/port. I used "CTs ipad" for the "Name" field and the ip address for the host, I had no idea what it should be. I didn't change the name for "Local Name" or "Bonjour Name" and just rolled with the automatically populated name in the "My Sessions" input field. Once "Enabled" radio checkbox is ticked> ip address is displayed in the UI between "Participants" and "Live Routings" on the same line which was "Address: "-host name-":5004. I used this ip address and port shown for the "My Sessions" host for the "Add Remote Peer" "Host/ Port" information.
3) select the Peer in the "Directory" input field> lftClk "Connect".
...Various things happened in the "Participants" input field: 2 entries for the host...then the second entry would disappear when navigating windows in other softwares. Disconnect: try again...CTs ipad now appears as participant with "???" displaying as latency...(*also, I note that there is some auto-connection happening here as the actual syntax of my ipad name (it is different syntax from the Peer syntax I had manually input) is showing as a second entry in the "Directory" and is the device that actually connects properly as a participant.)
4) Midi Designer Pro 2 settings. In Config-Connectioins spinning wheel as MDP2 tries to automatically conncet. I'd rather manually connect, oh well...but MDP2 is spinning away...when the rtpMIDI session is enabled, MDP2 should see the "network". Last night it connected fast...this morning the wheel for Wi-Fi Connections was spinning for quite a while. Turned on the Log screen to ensure midi is being sent out of MDP2 (it is)
5) I am using MIDI-OX to track midi messages. Upon first attempt, the rtpMIDI driver never appeared in MIDI-OX. Next morning...launch MIDI-OX and the driver is there...hmmm? ok, cool...no MIDI activity...but at least driver is there...
6) Windows Firewall...what else can it be, right?
so: Firewall & network protection> Allow an app through the firewall> opens "Allow apps to communicate through Windows Defender Firewall" dialog in the Allowed apps and features: scrolling... and verify rtpMIDISvc private and public is checked...(it was already checked from the original pop-up dialog when I first launched the software as described above)...which other program might it be?....searching...
I took a gamble on allowing "Windows Peer to Peer Collaboration Foundation"...close the "Allow apps to communicate through Windows Defender Firewall" dialog
7)...still no midi action in MIDI-OX and MDP2 Wi-Fi Connections still with "Searching + spinning wheel
8) reboot (I didn't close any open applications)
9) upon shutdown process Windows Update displays it is installing a Cumulative Update...oh really? when did that start?...percentage goes by...machine reboots...(did this firewall setting work? or did Windows 10 clandestinely install a missing driver?...I got no idea)
10) rtpMIDI now shows latency value for RT MIDI changes in MDP2 for the CTs ipad "Participants" entry! Hooray!
11) MDP2 now shows Host's "My Session" name in WiFi-Connections...still no MIDI activity MIDI-OX
12) On MDP2 UI: "No Connections" still displayed in upper right hand corner...go to Config>MIDI Designer Initiated Virtual MIDI switch on (blue highlight) MIDI In and MIDI Out and "No Connections" on MDP2 upper rhs has disappeared.
13) open and close MIDI-OX and reset the I/O drivers in MIDI-OX a couple times- still no midi action :-/
14) reboot and bang! midi activity in MIDI-OX. rtpMIDI is autolaunching in the background and remaining connected
15) Windows Firewall: so to try and understand if firewall setting was the fix: dis-allow / uncheck "Windows Peer to Peer Collaboration Foundation" to see if that is the culprit>reboot...hmmm, the connection is still stable (?) that's nice, but do I know what happened?: rtpMIDI showing latency values; MIDI-OX reporting MIDI activity...MDP2, tho, now shows a pop-up dialog stating a new connection whenever connect/ disconnect Participants in rtpMIDI UI.
16) also, MDP2 now automatically remembers this connection if the app is closed on ipad and reconnects next time MDP2 app is launched.
I hope this helps someone. I will report back here if I understand this better in future :-)